Saturday, September 25, 2010
"dendrophilia"
Saturday, August 21, 2010
ssspppaaarrrkkknnnooottteeessss
There's a point near the end of every school year, as you're rummaging frantically through your locker for one of six assignments you forgot to do, finding only garbage and wet gym clothes, that you say to yourself:next year will be different.
You will be clean, and responsible, and your locker won't be full of... what even is that, part of a goat? Next year, none of this. You'll start off on the right foot....OR WILL YOU?!
No.
Promise: You'll keep a decent sleep schedule this year. Every morning you'll wake up fresh as a daisy at 5 a.m., when you will read The Fancy Post-Courier and eat a dignified breakfast, like a British person.
Reality: A new MMO will require you to murder a specific number of unicorns by sunrise. A new reality show about trashy, whiny adulterers will captivate you until the wee hours of the morning. Your friends will demand that you come along as they drive around aimlessly until 4 a.m. One or all of these will cause you to get to sleep two minutes before you're supposed to wake up. Your dignified breakfast will be a bowl of nothing. Instead of reading the Post-Courier, you will read the nothing. Instead of being up by 5, you will fall asleep on the bus, and instead of being fresh as a daisy, you will be covered in coffee, because the grouchy bus driver will resort to pouring it on your head to wake you up.
Promise: Your locker will be clean and orderly this year. You will totally do this for once.
Reality: Halfway through the year, a Hazmat team will be dispatched to your locker. Citing conditions so ghastly that "something must be wrong with our Science Instruments," an obviously distressed scientist will declare the entire hallway unsafe for human life.
Promise: No more falling behind on required reading. You will read everything you're supposed to this time, and if you fall behind, you will read super-hard instead of solely relying on the (admittedly brilliant) SparkNotes.
Reality: You will wait until the last minute before lazily looking up the SparkNote.
Promise: You'll eat better this year, maybe bringing your own dainty lunch of lettuce wrapped around tofu, which you've heard is not necessarily as inedible as it sounds.
Reality: You will last until the first day the cafeteria offers Country-Fried Anything, whereupon you will realize you've been eating plants and goo, and fling your lunch angrily out the window.
Promise: No more getting to the end of the year with textbooks held together by duct tape and hope. You'll take care of them this year, enough so that when you're done with them, people will be able to tell what subject they were about.
Reality: Actually, you'll start off extremely well, treating your textbooks like a beloved baby (i.e. not mindlessly scribbling on them or anything). You will cover them in nice, shimmery book covers that cost like ten bucks, the kind the President would use if he were in high school. Then, when you're delicately opening your backpack to check on the safety of your precious, precious books, a clumsy passerby will dump like a gallon of Pepsi on them.
"Nooooooo!!" you will shout, falling to your knees and shaking your fists at the heavens. Then, you'll bust out the duct tape.
Sound familiar?
Friday, August 20, 2010
what if i were...
-month: july
-day of the week: thursday
-time of day: 6pm
-planet: saturn
-drink: dr. pepper
-animal: orangutan
-stone: amethyst
-bird: blue jay
-plant: hyacinth
-sound: the sound of a ball bouncing
-element: water
-song: california dreaming, the mamas and the papas
-movie: almost famous
-tv show: freaks and geeks
-book: kiss kiss, by roald dahl
-instrument: UKULELE :]
-fictional character: christine daae
-cartoon character: mickey mouse
-food: a blackberry
-taste: fade from sour to sweet.
-color: purple
-material: lace
-piece of clothing: skirt
-word: illuminate
-body part: leg
-school subject: biology
-number: 13
Thursday, August 19, 2010
the end of summer.
Tuesday, June 8, 2010
Wednesday, April 14, 2010
SUMMER TO DO LIST! v4.0
1 -have an adventure!
2 -do nothing
3 -ECLIPSE!
4 -get a tan.
5 -have a "facebook fast"...as in not signing in for a designated amount of time. I might also refrain from answering any text messages during this time...but I already do that anyway...hahaha
6 -have a friends marathon!
7 -eat amazing fries at a festival/the canfield fair.
8 -sleep past noon.
9 -stay out reeeeal real late.
10 -canfield fair
11 -eat handels ice cream, of course.
12 -ghost hunting!
13 -watch fireworks
14 -buy some old navy flip flops.
15 -sleep under the stars :]
16 -buy a few hippie skirts/sundresses...my usual summer attire.
17 -BAKE WITH JADE!
18 -have a photoshoot with one of my friends.
19 -go to a play ground
20 -pull an all-nighter
21 -swim in the ocean.
22 -go to pittsburgh for a bit.
23 -ride a rollercoaster
24 -do a cartwheel
25 -create a sidewalk chalk masterpiece.
26 -climb a tree
27 -watch world cup-ness
28 -blow bubbles
29 -ride a festival ride.
30 -be KIDNAPPED by MARKY!
31 -TOY STORY THREE!
32 -finish summer reading a head of time.
33 -jump on a trampoline.
34 -go swimming, of course.
35 -chill in the canfield square.
36 -eat birthday cake
37 -have an epic birthday
38 -open a birthday present
39 -LADY GAGA! SEPTEMBER 5TH. oh snap. i'm excited...
40 -catch fire flies
41 -bonfire...somewhere, someway.
42 -eat a 'smore.
43 -make another uke cover avec ma cousine, janell :]
44 -watch a sunset, and the following sunrise without sleeping in between.
45 -run a mile in the middle of the night.
46 -make a hemp necklace
47 -second annual "Beatles-thon".
48 -go...somewhere that isn't youngstown.
49 -lemon grove, july third.
50 -drink a huge slurpee
i have until september 6th to complete this list!
bold = complete
p.s. if i tagged you, it's very possible that you don't really have anything to do with this note...im just tagging some cool people.
2 -do nothing
3 -ECLIPSE!
4 -get a tan.
5 -have a "facebook fast"...as in not signing in for a designated amount of time. I might also refrain from answering any text messages during this time...but I already do that anyway...hahaha
6 -have a friends marathon!
7 -eat amazing fries at a festival/the canfield fair.
8 -sleep past noon.
9 -stay out reeeeal real late.
10 -canfield fair
11 -eat handels ice cream, of course.
12 -ghost hunting!
13 -watch fireworks
14 -buy some old navy flip flops.
15 -sleep under the stars :]
16 -buy a few hippie skirts/sundresses...my usual summer attire.
17 -BAKE WITH JADE!
18 -have a photoshoot with one of my friends.
19 -go to a play ground
20 -pull an all-nighter
21 -swim in the ocean.
22 -go to pittsburgh for a bit.
23 -ride a rollercoaster
24 -do a cartwheel
25 -create a sidewalk chalk masterpiece.
26 -climb a tree
27 -watch world cup-ness
28 -blow bubbles
29 -ride a festival ride.
30 -be KIDNAPPED by MARKY!
31 -TOY STORY THREE!
32 -finish summer reading a head of time.
33 -jump on a trampoline.
34 -go swimming, of course.
35 -chill in the canfield square.
36 -eat birthday cake
37 -have an epic birthday
38 -open a birthday present
39 -LADY GAGA! SEPTEMBER 5TH. oh snap. i'm excited...
40 -catch fire flies
41 -bonfire...somewhere, someway.
42 -eat a 'smore.
43 -make another uke cover avec ma cousine, janell :]
44 -watch a sunset, and the following sunrise without sleeping in between.
45 -run a mile in the middle of the night.
46 -make a hemp necklace
47 -second annual "Beatles-thon".
48 -go...somewhere that isn't youngstown.
49 -lemon grove, july third.
50 -drink a huge slurpee
i have until september 6th to complete this list!
bold = complete
p.s. if i tagged you, it's very possible that you don't really have anything to do with this note...im just tagging some cool people.